CAPTAIN. No, by my faith, George: come, come, let's to conjuring, let's to conjuring.

PYE. But if you look to be released--as my wits have took pain to work it, and all means wrought to farther it-- besides to put crowns in your purse, to make you a man of better hopes, and whereas before you were a Captain or poor Soldier, to make you now a Commander of rich fools, (which is truly the only best purchase peace can allow you) safer then High-ways, Heath, or Cunny-groves, and yet a far better booty; for your greatest thieves are never hangd, never hangd, for, why, they're wise, and cheat within doors: and we geld fools of more money in one night, then your false tailed Gelding will purchase in a twelve-month's running; which confirms the old Beldam saying, he's wisest, that keeps himself warmest; that is, he that robs by a good fire--

CAPTAIN. Well opened, yfaith, George; thou has pulled that saying out of the husk.

PYE. Captain Idle, tis no time now to delude or delay: the old Knight will be here suddenly. I'll perfect you, direct you, tell you the trick on't: tis nothing.

CAPTAIN. Sfoot, George, I know not what to say toot: conjure? I shall be hand ere I conjure.

PYE. Nay, tell not me of that, Captain; you'll ne'er conjure after you're hangd, I warrant you. Look you, sir, a parlous matter, sure! First, to spread your circle upon the ground, then, with a little conjuring ceremony, as I'll have an Hackney-man's wand silvered ore a purpose for you,--then arriving in the circle, with a huge word, and a great trample, as for instance:--have you never seen a stalking- stamping Player, that will raise a tempest with his tongue, and thunder with his heels?

CAPTAIN. O yes, yes, yes: often, often.

PYE. Why, be like such a one, for any thing will blear the old Knight's eyes: for you must note that he'll ne'er dare to venture into the room, only perhaps peep fearfully through the Key hold, to see how the Play goes forward.

CAPTAIN. Well, I may go about it when I will, but mark the end ont: I shall but shame my self, ifaith, George. Speak big words, and stamp and stare, and he look in at Key-hold! why, the very thought of that would make me laugh out-right, and spoil all: nay, I'll tell thee, George, when I apprehend a thing once, I am of such a laxative laughter, that if the Devil him-self stood by, I should laugh in his face.

PYE. Puh, that's but the babe of a man, and may easily be husht; as to think upon some disaster, some sad misfortune, as the death of thy Father ithe Country!

CAPTAIN. Sfoot, that would be the more to drive me into such an extasy, that I should ne'er lin laughing.

PYE. Why, then, think upon going to hanging else.

CAPTAIN. Mass, that's well remembred; now I'll do well, I warrant thee, ne'er fear me now: but how shall I do, George, for boisterous words, and horrible names?

PYE. Puh, any fustian invocations, Captain, will serve as well as the best, so you rant them out well; or you may go to a Pothecaries shop, and take all the words from the Boxes.

CAPTAIN. Troth, and you say true, George; there's strange words enow to raise a hundred Quack-salvers, tho they be ne'er so poor when they begin. But here lies the fear on't, how if in this false conjuration, a true Devil should pop up indeed?

PYE. A true Devil, Captain? why there was ne'er such a one: nay, faith, he that has this place is as false a Knave as our last Church-warden.

CAPTAIN. Then he's false enough a conscience, ifaith, George.

[The Crie at Marshalsea.]

CRIE PRISONERS. Good Gentlemen over the way, send your relief. Good Gentlemen over the way,--Good sir Godfrey!

PYE. He's come, he's come.

NICHOLAS. Master, that's my Kinsman yonder in the Buff-jerkin--Kinsman, that's my Master yonder ith' Taffetie Hat--pray salute him entirely!

[They salute: and Pye-board salutes Master Edmond.]

SIR GODFREY. Now, my friend.

PYE. May I pertake your name, sir?

EDMOND. My name is Master Edmond.

PYE. Master Edmond?--are you not a Welshman, sir?

EDMOND. A Welshman? why?

PYE. Because Master is your Christian name, and Edmond your sir name.

William Shakespeare
Classic Literature Library

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