Actus Tertius. Scena Prima.
Enter Antipholus of Ephesus, his man Dromio, Angelo the Goldsmith, and Balthaser the Merchant.
E.Anti. Good signior Angelo you must excuse vs all, My wife is shrewish when I keepe not howres; Say that I lingerd with you at your shop To see the making of her Carkanet, And that to morrow you will bring it home. But here's a villaine that would face me downe He met me on the Mart, and that I beat him, And charg'd him with a thousand markes in gold, And that I did denie my wife and house; Thou drunkard thou, what didst thou meane by this? E.Dro. Say what you wil sir, but I know what I know, That you beat me at the Mart I haue your hand to show; If y skin were parchment, & y blows you gaue were ink, Your owne hand-writing would tell you what I thinke
E.Ant. I thinke thou art an asse
E.Dro. Marry so it doth appeare By the wrongs I suffer, and the blowes I beare, I should kicke being kickt, and being at that passe, You would keepe from my heeles, and beware of an asse
E.An. Y'are sad signior Balthazar, pray God our cheer May answer my good will, and your good welcom here
Bal. I hold your dainties cheap sir, & your welcom deer
E.An. Oh signior Balthazar, either at flesh or fish, A table full of welcome, makes scarce one dainty dish
Bal. Good meat sir is co[m]mon that euery churle affords
Anti. And welcome more common, for thats nothing but words
Bal. Small cheere and great welcome, makes a merrie feast
Anti. I, to a niggardly Host, and more sparing guest: But though my cates be meane, take them in good part, Better cheere may you haue, but not with better hart. But soft, my doore is lockt; goe bid them let vs in
E.Dro. Maud, Briget, Marian, Cisley, Gillian, Ginn
S.Dro. Mome, Malthorse, Capon, Coxcombe, Idiot, Patch, Either get thee from the dore, or sit downe at the hatch: Dost thou coniure for wenches, that y calst for such store, When one is one too many, goe get thee from the dore
E.Dro. What patch is made our Porter? my Master stayes in the street
S.Dro. Let him walke from whence he came, lest hee catch cold on's feet
E.Ant. Who talks within there? hoa, open the dore
S.Dro. Right sir, Ile tell you when, and you'll tell me wherefore
Ant. Wherefore? for my dinner: I haue not din'd to day
S.Dro. Nor to day here you must not come againe when you may
Anti. What art thou that keep'st mee out from the howse I owe? S.Dro. The Porter for this time Sir, and my name is Dromio
E.Dro. O villaine, thou hast stolne both mine office and my name, The one nere got me credit, the other mickle blame: If thou hadst beene Dromio to day in my place, Thou wouldst haue chang'd thy face for a name, or thy name for an asse.
Enter Luce.
Luce. What a coile is there Dromio? who are those at the gate? E.Dro. Let my Master in Luce
Luce. Faith no, hee comes too late, and so tell your Master
E.Dro. O Lord I must laugh, haue at you with a Prouerbe, Shall I set in my staffe
Luce. Haue at you with another, that's when? can you tell? S.Dro. If thy name be called Luce, Luce thou hast answer'd him well
Anti. Doe you heare you minion, you'll let vs in I hope? Luce. I thought to haue askt you
S.Dro. And you said no